When I was younger I used to think I was rather graceful.
In fact I was so sure of this that whenever I did do something clumsy (which, in retrospect, was quite often), I'd think to myself that it was a fluke. A one-time occurrence. A blip on my otherwise graceful existence.
I am not exaggerating here. I even imagined that in the biographies that would be written about me (I had quite a vivid imagination, if you couldn't tell) they would make special note of how graceful I was. That's how much I believed it.
But tonight I decided that if they do write autobiographies about me (And hey, it could happen. Leave me some dreams intact, please.) there will be no mention of my gracefulness. Tonight I realized that I am not just not graceful, I am actually very clumsy.
This is because tonight I kicked over my open water bottle and dumped water all over the carpet.
But Janette, you say, That's not so bad. That's a one-time fluke.
It's not.
It's the third night in a row that I've done it.
The first AND SECOND time, the water poured right onto the computer. (Don't worry, I didn't ruin it.)
*Sigh*
Goodbye, dreams of gracefulness.
Here's to hoping I don't do it again tomorrow night.
hahahahahaha
ReplyDeleteI didn't destroy that image for you a couple years ago?
I tried to ignore you Joseph.
ReplyDeleteI do the same thing. When I come home and use cups I leave them on the floor and then my mom gets mad at me for some reason...like graceful Laura Taylor is ever going to knock them over! I'll admit that sometimes they just fall over, but it's not MY fault the cups tilt so easily, it's like they actually want to lay on their sides...sigh.
ReplyDeleteI think you eat gracefully
ReplyDeleteYou said autobiography in the second paragraph. You know autobiographies are written by yourself, right? So unless you're dictating from the grave, that should read biographies...
ReplyDeleteJust because I want to destroy your dreams further.